When I do an image search of the word “caliber,” I find hundreds of pictures of vehicles! Also, a few of guns and watches. However, caliber is something many are missing in relationships – starting with yourself.
While there are several definitions of the word caliber, the focus in this blog will be on “the degree of excellence or importance” in regards to quality time: quality time with yourself and with others. Therefore, the 6th characteristic of a positive leadership legacy is just that: excellence in time spent with others as well as making it an important part of life.
Quality time is “time during which one focuses on or dedicates oneself to a person or activity.”
We spend much money on a high-quality T.V. yet spend so little time with others and friends. A person who leaves a positive legacy is someone who spends quality time with himself/herself and with others. It is a person who understands the difference between the two and works (yes, it takes work at times) to do both. So,the first part is time with yourself.
Quality Time with Yourself
ADVANTAGES OF QUALITY ALONE TIME (some of this is from Myra Ackerman)
1. Allows You to Reconnect with Yourself
Just like quality time spent with others, quality alone time has a certain magic to it. It helps you connect with yourself. However, the presence of others makes it harder to be tuned in to ourselves. This is especially true for highly empathetic people, who find it easy to get in touch with the needs and desires of others. Time alone gives you the opportunity to reconnect with your own needs and desires, and deepens your understanding of who you really are.
2. Relaxing and Healing
Quality alone time gives you inner strength to better handle the rest of your life. It can be deeply relaxing, soothing, and energizing. Quality alone time may be the closest thing to meditation that most people experience. Meditation often means we need to find a quiet space to be alone.
3. Promotes Flow
Quality time alone promotes flow – a highly beneficial psychological phenomenon. Flow is a deep concentration, which results from a focused engagement in an activity. It is associated with quality results, and is often experienced by writers and researchers. Some refer this to “being in the zone.” They are focused on the task at hand.
Time with ourselves is very important. So, too is time with others. That can be with family and close friends. We are not meant to be alone in the world as one of our basic needs is relationships.
Quality Time with Others
In regards to relationships “Quality time can best be defined as time dedicated to being together, but crucially it’s also time focused on being attentive to one another. For instance, this means that sitting together in silence in front of the TV is not quality time. You might be next to each other, but it’s not the type of time that is going to bring you closer together and deepen your love and attraction for each other.”
ADVANTAGES OF QUALITY TIME WITH OTHERS
1. Bonding
Quality time with others strengthens and nourishes existing relationships. When you spend time with others, you devote your attention and energy to them and your relationships with them. This can establish a bond with another person.
People leave imprints on our lives, shaping who we become in much the same way that a symbol is pressed into the page of a book to tell you who it comes from.― Ashly Lorenzana
2. Not alone
You realize you are not alone. There are others to confide is, to comfort you when needed, to celebrate with you in the good times.
Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light. Helen Keller.
3. Balance
It provides balance in your life. Alone time is needed, but so is time with friends and family. No one person has been nor will be created to spend life alone. We were made to be social beings. We were created to
The best and safest thing is to keep a balance in your life… If you can do that, and live that way, you are really a wise man. Euripides
No matter who you are, or where you are at in life, you can have a balanced life by spending quality alone time and quality time with others (friends and family). A person who leaves a positive legacy does both. If you are not already doing this, then take this as a challenge to begin now.